What's joy and how to cultivate it...
I can recount time when someone asked me how things are going and when I shared the reality of something more challenging, hard or maybe a negative experience, I was met my with a “but you’re so blessed…just be grateful.” Offering a response like this right after someone was vulnerable suggests that they are ungrateful, too negative and as if life is an easy paved road.
I think about my life as a parent: I am both grateful and very tired. I can be both and One doesn’t take away from the other.
So, what’s joy? It’s not happiness because life has us ebbing and flowing and sometime at full-speed into grief, sorrow and challenges. Happiness is fleeting, but joy is what we were made for. We build upon it and I think the hard stuff in our life enhances it our experience with it.
Being joyful isn’t this permanent smile that we carry everywhere we go and with everyone we encounter. It’s more like an anchor for those really bumpy moments in our life. We can be on the boat of life and think: When will this storm calm down? When will the waves stop crashing into me? That’s when we can remember we are anchored. We have other good things and good people in our life (or the good people in your life come alongside you to help you restore joy).
How do you cultivate a life of joy? You recount moments you’ve experienced it and moments you’re overwhelmed with gratitude because that’s the transforming power of joy. When you rest your head at night, pause to consider the joys in your relationships, interactions, creation and more. Let that usher in peace.
Ways to cultivate joy:
Journal about what’s causing heartache and grief in your life. Or what are your repeating thoughts? Sit there for a bit allowing yourself process all your thoughts around that. Then, write down the things that you’re grateful for and things that are making you smile.
Move your body! Stretch, exercise or play that game of tag with your kids. This is a mood-booster and my go-to for a shift from my heavy thoughts.
Send a gift just because. Sometimes just showing appreciation and gratitude for the people in your life is the best joy-remedy. Always remember: Doesn’t have to be grand to be thoughtful.
Call a friend. Share your hard then ask: What’s bringing you joy? This will allow your friend and you to shift from negative to positive and it will grow your connection.
I’d love to hear what’s bringing you joy! Share in the comments.
with joy,
Aneta Nina
Founder/Designer of GWJ